Forgiveness I

The inspiration for this poem…

The poems “Forgiveness I” and “II” came out of a time where I was struggling to forgive several different people in my life for some very big things, including my parents who are featured widely in this collection. I participated in a retreat on this topic where we watched a documentary about forgiveness in very difficult circumstances (i.e. between Arabs & Israelis, parents of murder victims and the murderers, Protestants & Catholics in Belfast, etc.). One segment featured three moms who lost their sons on 9/11 who were faced with having no remains to bury– only truckloads of what was left being dumped in open fields in New Jersey. They stood in one of these fields talking about how angry they were even though they had no idea who to be angry with so they couldn’t even begin to forgive or grieve. I felt guilty for how small my troubles seemed in comparison, but at least I knew exactly who I should be angry with. Anger began to bubble up, scaring me with its ferocity. I was uncomfortable with it and yet it was crucial to pushing me forward. But it was my first step toward real forgiveness. One of the retreat leaders asked if I would consider writing a poem and these two poems came pouring out. They began as one poem but a key reader failed to see more was on the back. When I pointed it out he said, “No, there are enough pieces of forgiveness on the first page alone, there are at least two poems here!” So, two poems were born. 

“Forgiveness I” focuses on tailoring forgiveness to make it what you need it to be without letting anyone take that away from you. It makes the point that forgiveness has no “expiration date or…statute of limitation.” It ends with my dog who has an instinct for how to care for her own wounds, which has helped me learn to be more instinctive in caring for my own.

Writing/Meditation Prompts:

• What do you need to forgive? Why? How? When? Where? Those questions are yours to ask and/or answer as you see fit. This is your journey, every step of the way. Remember: there is no expiration date or statute of limitation until you are done.

• Do you need to ask for forgiveness from someone(s)? What does that process look like for you? Are there any emotions getting in the way that you need to deal with first??

• Have you ever accidentally hurt a pet by tripping over them, shutting a tail in the door, not feeding/walking them on time? How did they react? What did you do?

• Write a letter of apology or a recipe for forgiveness. What will you do with it once you’re done- does someone need to hear it?